HOLLY BERCKELMAN


Dating column for Body+Soul

New stories dropping every Wednesday at 8pm.

bodyandsoul •

5 ways to spot an All-Talk Guy

On my recent travels through the weathered wasteland that is dating apps in late 2022, I have made a discovery. It seems there exists a new form of man, one that I have yet to come across before. In fact, one I never even fathomed to exist. And who are these gentlemen? What I like to call All-Talk Guys. All-Talk Guys, or ATGs, are a rare variety of men who you will probably never meet in person. Why? Because, by definition, they will talk and talk and talk about how much they want to see you,
bodyandsoul •

Your go-to guide for being single this festive season

To the delight of many and the horror of others, it's finally December, which means the festive season has *officially* begun. Recently-beheaded fir trees arrive in supermarkets, cheery Spotify playlists get blasted on repeat in department stores and work Christmas parties are unceremoniously dropped into the iCal. There’s a lot to look forward to. Especially if, like me, you unreservedly love the holidays. But even if you were a Christmas elf in a former life, despite the carols and cheer, i
bodyandsoul •

5 things I learnt from my best friend’s wedding

I’ve always been sceptical when people say their wedding day should be the happiest day of their life. “What about all the rest of your life together?” I’d parrot, from my high horse of a semi-functional four year relationship fraught with love but mostly fighting. “It shouldn’t be the happiest day, it’s just the start” Ok, Holly. Bold words from someone who is very much not married nor has been anywhere close. But this pragmatic, somewhat jaded view of love is what seems to have taken over i
bodyandsoul •

The physical traits men look for in a partner are unsurprisingly different to women, and we have thoughts

New data has revealed the physical traits men and women find most important when looking for a partner and, in a shock to nobody at all, they’re not the same for men and women. Commissioned by dental comparison platform AirSmile , the independent study asked 1002 Aussies to identify their top three physical traits out of a list of seven. Coming in first place, by a big margin, was good oral hygiene and teeth, with 75 per cent of respondents ranking good chompers highly in a partner. Up next w
bodyandsoul •

All the things you could do instead of waiting for someone to text you back

There are officially 8 billion people in the world, yet it seems not a single one is remotely interested in texting me back. I’m serious. The last few weeks have seen me make semi-permanent residence in a special layer of purgatory where no one I’m even vaguely interested in has deigned to reply in a timely fashion. This is a modern form of hell. One that has me pretty much considering a full-time switch to Neo-Luddism. Yet even without a phone, somehow I’m certain I’d still be left unanswered
bodyandsoul •

‘Everyone should have a work crush, here's why’

Going to work is hard. Overflowing inboxes, meetings that should’ve been emails, workplace drama and deadlines galore – whether you love, hate or tolerate your role, it is exhausting. Some people are back in the office full-time, others have not seen an office since March 2020, most are working in a blended capacity, which requires a layer of organisation that even the most sophisticated server can barely handle. Pair that with the hangover fatigue from two of the weirdest years of work we’ll e
bodyandsoul •

Hurrah! Paid Parental Leave will be extended to six months and it’s about time

The Federal government has announced Paid Parental Leave will be extended to six months – with the flexibility to choose how it’s split between parents – in the biggest boost to the program since it was introduced in 2011. Paid Parental Leave is currently available for up to 18 weeks, but will be increased to 26 weeks over the coming four years: to 22 weeks in 2024, 24 weeks in 2025, and 26 weeks in 2026. Anyone who has a child in the next 14 months will not be eligible for the additional leave
bodyandsoul •

'I'm sick of photo memories reminding me of my breakup'

I’m approaching a number of anniversaries in the coming weeks. Some very fond, some so acutely unpleasant they still give me acid reflux. I’m a bit of a sucker for milestones, and find comfort in the reminder of how much or how little time has passed. I remember the date I met the guy who occupied my mind for years in my late teens and early 20s. I remember the day I came back to Australia after living overseas. I remember the date the pandemic began. I remember the day our last lockdown ended
bodyandsoul •

Why are people so smug when open relationships don’t work out?

Since the dawn of time, people have been interested in relationships. Be it a general cluelessness or just an innate sense of curiosity, but it’s one of the few topics people simply cannot get enough of. Since the dawn of time, people have also been incredibly nosy and critical. And while I’ll be the first to put my hand up and say I’ve spent approximately 18 hours this week devouring the Florence Pugh-Harry Styles-Olivia Wilde dumpster fire from the Venice Film Festival - not to mention #spit
bodyandsoul •

These are the biggest dating deal breakers – are you guilty?

Everyone has a mental checklist of things they just can’t put up with in a relationship. And when you pose the question of the ultimate deal breakers, there’s always at least one thing that immediately springs to mind. For some, it may be a behaviour, like social climbing, or taking drugs on a night out. For others, it could be a qualification, or lack thereof, such as not having a driver’s licence, or being under or over a certain height. For Leonardo DiCaprio, it’s dating any woman over the